Cousin Homer's Anything Goes Dance Hall

well i had a mini-battle with my baby last night
so i left her for the dance hall to make it all right
i grabbed a mini-bottle at the end of the bar
then lord have mercy i saw a movie star
now just who she was i couldn't see quite clear
but i saw her throwin' down shots through the smoke and the beer
just as i made it over to ask for her hand
well the dogs started howlin' as they struck up the band

hey ho, here i go
if you see my baby just let her know
i'm headed down the road
to a little dance hall where anything goes

well your mouth starts waterin' when you walk through the door
take in the smell of sawdust down on the floor
it doesn't matter where you come from, just where you are
just grab a pretty dance partner and a PBR

hey ho, here i go
if you see my baby just let her know
i'm headed down the road
to a little dance hall where anything goes

well the boys in the band are still out of tune
but they get 'em swinging from the rafters in the middle of june
so get yourself down to the finest hole in the wall
it's cousin homer's anything goes dance hall

hey ho, here i go
if you see my baby just let her know
i'm headed down the road
to a little dance hall where anything goes